OT - Need advice on a sensitive issue

[sugar rose]

Hi all, maybe you can give me some advice. I'm trying to help a sweet older relative clear out her house. She's had lifelong struggles with multiple mental disorders, and it's very hard for her to sort and organize, and also to part with things. She's also had to pinch pennies her whole life. She doesn't have much in the way of mental health support.

I just don't know where to start with her stuff! Most of it is just ordinary household stuff - clothes, lots of books, kitchen stuff, craft & art supplies, also mail and papers - but there's just too much of it. When she tries to sort through things, she gets overwhelmed with anxiety and cries... It really breaks my heart and I want to help her.

My siblings are helping a little, but they are not nearby. One of my siblings is also a little bit "ruthless" and it upsets her.

The nitty gritty of deciding between two sweaters, for example, is hard for me - I don't know which sweater is scratchy, or which color she likes better...

Has anyone had experience dealing with this sort of thing? (Maybe this problem is outside the scope of most people's experience...)

I'm so distressed over this! - Thanks for reading. All replies are appreciated.