Is this motivating me or discouraging me- what would you do?

kellyslims · 05-05-09, 04:10 PM

Okay, so after having my second baby 10 months ago, I still am not back to prepregnancy weight, I had some complications with the healing of this c section & an illness so I was delayed a bit. Now everything is good to go, and beginning in December I have returned to my dvds faithfully

Question is, I have a lot of clothes that fit me before I was pregnant this time and even some from before I was pregnant first time with my son ( that was in 2002!), and I mean a lot! I counted and there's 40 tops/sweaters and about 36 bottoms, skirts/pants.

Like I said some of these clothes haven't fit me in about 6 years but for some reason I have chosen to keep them. Lately though I feel like they are suffocating me. Does that make sense? Like, after I've done a solid 6 week rotation and feel smaller I'll try some stuff on and when it doesn't fit I am heartbroken. But I feel like I shouldn't get rid of them because that's admitting that I have failed in fitness.

Does anyone have advice or a system for deciding what stays and what goes? Currently I am working out and eating healthy but my size/shape is different, there isn't one bottom there that I can button up! Anyone been in this situation before? Advice?

thanks for your suggestions

kelly

suebella · 05-05-09, 04:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kellyslims

Okay, so after having my second baby 10 months ago, I still am not back to prepregnancy weight, I had some complications with the healing of this c section & an illness so I was delayed a bit. Now everything is good to go, and beginning in December I have returned to my dvds faithfully

I have never had a baby, but from what I've heard and observed, this isn't that unusual. You need to be less hard on yourself.

Quote:

Originally Posted by kellyslims

Question is, I have a lot of clothes that fit me before I was pregnant this time and even some from before I was pregnant first time with my son ( that was in 2002!), and I mean a lot! I counted and there's 40 tops/sweaters and about 36 bottoms, skirts/pants.

Like I said some of these clothes haven't fit me in about 6 years but for some reason I have chosen to keep them. Lately though I feel like they are suffocating me. Does that make sense? Like, after I've done a solid 6 week rotation and feel smaller I'll try some stuff on and when it doesn't fit I am heartbroken. But I feel like I shouldn't get rid of them because that's admitting that I have failed in fitness.

Don't let those clothes beat you up! You have failed at nothing, you are just in a different phase of your life with a different body. Down the line, you might fit into those clothes, but right now they are causing you misery. I would give them away. If you have one or two favorites, I guess I might keep those, but otherwise, I'd just get them out of the house.

~^~RedFlame~^~ · 05-05-09, 04:31 PM

Here is a true story for you. I don't know if it fits your situation, but I would think about it.

I started working out when I quit smoking. I was probably a size 5/6 (this was when a size MEANT the size, now I can be anything from a 2 to a 13 it seems!). I had some cute clothes, and never really thought about what 'fitness' might do to my body. After some time with the Firms I was looking pretty good and feeling damn good and along comes a party. I pull out my favorite LBD and SHOCK it does not want to zip up! This dress that always just zipped right up. I was absolutely devastated. Well, long story short I couldn't wear it, but everyone said I looked just awesome, what had I been doing, yada yada. Yup, I had some muscle on my body now, a bit of "round" where my biceps were, some lats developed from the rows, stuff like that, even obliques can make your waist measurement higher if you were small to begin with. So what I am getting at is to PLEASE not let tight clothing always mean bad things, for one thing, and keeping something that you will never wear again (if that is the case) does not motivate, it discourages IMO.

Cerulea · 05-05-09, 04:56 PM

The problem with hanging on to clothes like that for 6+ years is that there is a good chance that once you are able to get into them, you will find that you don't want to wear them because they are out of style...which is exactly what happened to me after I lost my baby weight. (In my case, it was work clothes, since I waited a few years before I went back.)

If I were you, I'd go through it all and keep only what you absolutely *love* and is also timeless, and get rid of the rest. Be ruthless. Also, if you get rid of the clothes, you get to go shopping once you hit your goal

bzar · 05-05-09, 04:58 PM

i think you already know the answer to your question, but may have difficulty in coming to terms with it - at least for me, i've felt that way when cleaning out my closets.

geneen roth, an author and columnist for several magazines, once discussed this subject. she said that it can weigh on you mentally, especially if you're reluctant to let the clothes go.

sometimes it might be a "clutter issue" - would you really wear those items again even if you could fit in them? what some psychologists suggest is this is a good chance to clear out and replace, start fresh and find something that is just as becoming on you NOW rather than something from the past.

FitBoop · 05-05-09, 05:11 PM

Hi Kelly! My advice is to take all the old clothes and put them into bags. The ones you love, put away somewhere and the rest, donate to charity. I advise you to buy clothes that fit you now. You will feel better about yourself, will forget about those old clothes and whatever size you used to be, and will be in style!

caligurl · 05-05-09, 05:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cerulea

The problem with hanging on to clothes like that for 6+ years is that there is a good chance that once you are able to get into them, you will find that you don't want to wear them because they are out of style...which is exactly what happened to me after I lost my baby weight. (In my case, it was work clothes, since I waited a few years before I went back.)

If I were you, I'd go through it all and keep only what you absolutely *love* and is also timeless, and get rid of the rest. Be ruthless. Also, if you get rid of the clothes, you get to go shopping once you hit your goal

that was the first thing that came to my mind when i saw that they were over 6 years old.... "out of fashion/style" anyways...

so ya... just get rid of any but your absolute timeless favorites and send the rest off to charity!

kellyslims · 05-05-09, 05:34 PM

thanks guys, and yeah I guess I knew the answer I just needed some support

- weird eh? They are just clothes but for some reason in my mind they represented more than something to wear.

There's nothing really special in those 70 + pieces they are all basics like black dress pants, four sizes of them, black skirts of varying lengths, four sizes, white blouses, four sizes- ugh!!

I think I am just going to give it all away and hope that someone somewhere will enjoy them- maybe even four people somewhere!

thanks again

ETA I am looking into that author mentioned, sounds like a worthwhile read for me!

Pratima · 05-05-09, 05:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Cerulea

The problem with hanging on to clothes like that for 6+ years is that there is a good chance that once you are able to get into them, you will find that you don't want to wear them because they are out of style...which is exactly what happened to me after I lost my baby weight. (In my case, it was work clothes, since I waited a few years before I went back.)

This was true for me. I had a hard time with my clothes after baby 1, but I'm 3 weeks postpartum now and looking forward to shopping for new stuff if I need to! Last time I gave myself a time limit of 18 months. I got pregnant at 19 months postpartum, so the timeline worked out for me. I think I'll do the same this time.

BTW, there's an old thread around here somewhere (I'll search for it if I can) where I posted about the museum that is my wardrobe. There are clothes from before my first pregnancy, larger size and maternity clothes from that pregnancy (mostly warm-weather stuff and a lot of work stuff), things I wore for a few months afterward, the new stuff I eventually bought, and now maternity clothes (winter stuff) from this pregnancy. It's just ridiculous!

Pratima · 05-05-09, 05:45 PM

Found it--my original post made me smile, hope you enjoy it too!

http://forum.videofitness.com/showth...ghlight=museum

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05-05-09, 04:10 PM
kellyslims Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Canada	Is this motivating me or discouraging me- what would you do? Okay, so after having my second baby 10 months ago, I still am not back to prepregnancy weight, I had some complications with the healing of this c section & an illness so I was delayed a bit. Now everything is good to go, and beginning in December I have returned to my dvds faithfully Question is, I have a lot of clothes that fit me before I was pregnant this time and even some from before I was pregnant first time with my son ( that was in 2002!), and I mean a lot! I counted and there's 40 tops/sweaters and about 36 bottoms, skirts/pants. Like I said some of these clothes haven't fit me in about 6 years but for some reason I have chosen to keep them. Lately though I feel like they are suffocating me. Does that make sense? Like, after I've done a solid 6 week rotation and feel smaller I'll try some stuff on and when it doesn't fit I am heartbroken. But I feel like I shouldn't get rid of them because that's admitting that I have failed in fitness. Does anyone have advice or a system for deciding what stays and what goes? Currently I am working out and eating healthy but my size/shape is different, there isn't one bottom there that I can button up! Anyone been in this situation before? Advice? thanks for your suggestions kelly

05-05-09, 04:31 PM
~^~RedFlame~^~ VF Supporter Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Littleton, Colo	Here is a true story for you. I don't know if it fits your situation, but I would think about it. I started working out when I quit smoking. I was probably a size 5/6 (this was when a size MEANT the size, now I can be anything from a 2 to a 13 it seems!). I had some cute clothes, and never really thought about what 'fitness' might do to my body. After some time with the Firms I was looking pretty good and feeling damn good and along comes a party. I pull out my favorite LBD and SHOCK it does not want to zip up! This dress that always just zipped right up. I was absolutely devastated. Well, long story short I couldn't wear it, but everyone said I looked just awesome, what had I been doing, yada yada. Yup, I had some muscle on my body now, a bit of "round" where my biceps were, some lats developed from the rows, stuff like that, even obliques can make your waist measurement higher if you were small to begin with. So what I am getting at is to PLEASE not let tight clothing always mean bad things, for one thing, and keeping something that you will never wear again (if that is the case) does not motivate, it discourages IMO. __________________ ~^~RedFlame~^~ Proud GRADUATE of P90X!! TWICE Class 2007&2008!! Burn Burn BUUUUURRRRRNNNN! One's main goal in life is to give birth to oneself. If you are not busy being born, you are busy dying!

05-05-09, 04:56 PM
Cerulea Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: Denial	The problem with hanging on to clothes like that for 6+ years is that there is a good chance that once you are able to get into them, you will find that you don't want to wear them because they are out of style...which is exactly what happened to me after I lost my baby weight. (In my case, it was work clothes, since I waited a few years before I went back.) If I were you, I'd go through it all and keep only what you absolutely love and is also timeless, and get rid of the rest. Be ruthless. Also, if you get rid of the clothes, you get to go shopping once you hit your goal

05-05-09, 04:58 PM
bzar Exchange Moderator Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: PalmTreeVille	i think you already know the answer to your question, but may have difficulty in coming to terms with it - at least for me, i've felt that way when cleaning out my closets. geneen roth, an author and columnist for several magazines, once discussed this subject. she said that it can weigh on you mentally, especially if you're reluctant to let the clothes go. sometimes it might be a "clutter issue" - would you really wear those items again even if you could fit in them? what some psychologists suggest is this is a good chance to clear out and replace, start fresh and find something that is just as becoming on you NOW rather than something from the past. __________________ ~jeannine Miyagi: Wax on, right hand. Wax off, left hand. Wax on, wax off. Breathe in through nose, out the mouth. Wax on, wax off. Don't forget to breathe, very important. [walks away, still making circular motions with hands] ~ Pat Morita, The Karate Kid, 1984 disclosure: in the years 2002-2004 i had a professional relationship with a distributor of fitness videos; see profile.

05-05-09, 05:11 PM
FitBoop VF Supporter Join Date: Nov 2001	Hi Kelly! My advice is to take all the old clothes and put them into bags. The ones you love, put away somewhere and the rest, donate to charity. I advise you to buy clothes that fit you now. You will feel better about yourself, will forget about those old clothes and whatever size you used to be, and will be in style!

05-05-09, 05:34 PM
kellyslims Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: Canada	thanks guys, and yeah I guess I knew the answer I just needed some support- weird eh? They are just clothes but for some reason in my mind they represented more than something to wear. There's nothing really special in those 70 + pieces they are all basics like black dress pants, four sizes of them, black skirts of varying lengths, four sizes, white blouses, four sizes- ugh!! I think I am just going to give it all away and hope that someone somewhere will enjoy them- maybe even four people somewhere! thanks again ETA I am looking into that author mentioned, sounds like a worthwhile read for me!

05-05-09, 05:45 PM
Pratima Exchange Moderator Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Phoenix, AZ	Found it--my original post made me smile, hope you enjoy it too! http://forum.videofitness.com/showth...ghlight=museum __________________ Don't care what people say, just follow your own way. -- Enigma, Return to Innocence DISCLOSURE: I have professional relationships with several producers of fitness videos and related products; please see my profile for details.