Over 45 and happy with your body?

[dakko]

Originally Posted by toaster

Thanks, Renee and Sue...I was feeling a little remorseful that I may have gotten too preachy.

I enjoyed your comment as well.

I've also appreciated this thread, as it is interesting to get an idea of target weights. I'm 5'7" and overweight, but was underweight before having children and have no idea what my target 'should' be.

[toaster]

Originally Posted by dakko

I enjoyed your comment as well.

I've also appreciated this thread, as it is interesting to get an idea of target weights. I'm 5'7" and overweight, but was underweight before having children and have no idea what my target 'should' be.

Thanks dakko! I was actually originally going to post my weight, but I decided not to--I think it just invites unhealthy comparisons amongst women. Honestly, anyone can look up a height/weight chart online to get an idea of "target" weights, but as we all know, those are imperfect--i.e., if you are a regular exerciser who has more muscle, you might be on the higher end of or even above your "ideal" weight, but still perfectly fine.

[TinierTina]

Originally Posted by toaster

Thanks dakko! I was actually originally going to post my weight, but I decided not to--I think it just invites unhealthy comparisons amongst women. Honestly, anyone can look up a height/weight chart online to get an idea of "target" weights, but as we all know, those are imperfect--i.e., if you are a regular exerciser who has more muscle, you might be on the higher end of or even above your "ideal" weight, but still perfectly fine.

You just said the right (or even just politically correct) thing about posting or not posting weights, self-to-self comparisons of weights over time, female clothing sizes, female measurements, etc. (apologies to any male lurkers or potential participants is implied). To elicit any comments from me.

This does not mean this is or is not my issue or issues.

Your consciousness seems raised.

But you do take a longer, more anti-trigger view.

[dakko]

Originally Posted by toaster

Thanks dakko! I was actually originally going to post my weight, but I decided not to--I think it just invites unhealthy comparisons amongst women. Honestly, anyone can look up a height/weight chart online to get an idea of "target" weights, but as we all know, those are imperfect--i.e., if you are a regular exerciser who has more muscle, you might be on the higher end of or even above your "ideal" weight, but still perfectly fine.

Hmm. Ya, the charts advise 30 lbs more than my college weight. If I choose small frame the numbers look better, but I'm actually a medium frame.

I think I will just focus on fitness and forget about the numbers.

[toaster]

Originally Posted by TinierTina

Your consciousness seems raised.

I hope so...as I said, I'm a psychologist, so it's kind of my job.

(But, think as women, it should be all of our jobs! )

[TinierTina]

Originally Posted by toaster

I hope so...as I said, I'm a psychologist, so it's kind of my job.

(But, think as women, it should be all of our jobs! )

At a 4 year mostly residential college campus. Counseling youth and young adults. Did you ever read The Body Project?

I don't want to be on a soapbox about this and bore everybody.

As far as over 45 and happy with my body?

Suffice to say (baseball talk), no hits, no runs, no errors.

[Lannette]

Originally Posted by toaster

Thanks dakko! I was actually originally going to post my weight, but I decided not to--I think it just invites unhealthy comparisons amongst women. Honestly, anyone can look up a height/weight chart online to get an idea of "target" weights, but as we all know, those are imperfect--i.e., if you are a regular exerciser who has more muscle, you might be on the higher end of or even above your "ideal" weight, but still perfectly fine.

Weight is a number on the scale. That's true but I can tell you that when I was almost 45 lbs heavier no amount of "embrace the body you're in, weight doesn't matter" could help me feel healthier.

I felt sluggish and tired and miserable. So while I agree that there is nothing to be gained by making our weight the key to our happiness, we're only kidding ourselves if we tell ourselves it truly doesn't matter at all.

I think we can do ourselves a huge disservice, not to mention leave ourselves at higher risk of disease when we ride the "my weight doesn't matter" wagon.

[Debbie S.]

First, I think how one see's herself isn't quite that cut and dry. It would be wonderful if everyone looked in the mirror and was happy with their body, but in the real world, it is not the case.

Body Shaming, rather directly at a person or through the media, can really play a number with a person's mind. Despite this person having a beautiful body, she will not see it, and she will not be happy with her body.

It's is darn right hard to break free of the negativity that arises once a person is body shamed.

It's wonderful that there are women who love their bodies and who have never been self conscious with the way they look. In fact, I admire the hell out of them, no matter what size they are. They are comfortable in their own skin and that is the way one should live their life.

I was always happy with the way I looked. I embraced working out when I was 16 years old and living a fit life quickly became a passion. Then something happened that ruined my self esteem. After my second child was born, my husband told me that he was not attracted to me and that I reminded him of his mother. The person who I married and loved dearly threw out these words and it pierced my heart so deeply from that point on I was ashamed of my body. Every trip to the beach from that point on had me sitting there in a cover up, despite working out and staying fit.

In Oct. I joined an online 10 week online transform you challenge. My main reason for joining was to reignite the spark that I have for working out. The death of my mother and brother within a week of each other in September really did a number on me. Even though I continued with my workouts, I felt NOTHING! I thought focusing on me would help reignite the spark.

What I didn't expect was how it changed me so deeply mentally. I started focusing on the body parts that I was ashamed of. Instead of putting on my makeup and drying my hair with a robe on, I did my morning routine without anything on!!!! Throughout the 10 week period I found myself really looking at myself and for the first time in 34 years accepting and actually liking what I saw in the mirror. So much so that I wore a two piece bathing suit for the final transformation pictures, and even posted 2 of them on my main Face Book page!!! I would never have done that in the past. NEVER!!!

So for the women out there who were body shamed and led to you not being happy with the way you look, spend some time focusing on you. Expose the parts that you are unhappy with and spend time really looking at it daily. Chances are you look a lot better than what you are seeing in the mirror. Chances are you will finally break free of your negative thoughts.

[sherry7899]

Debbie- I am so very sorry for your losses. I cannot imagine losing two family members so close together. Many hugs to you-
Sherry

[Lannette]

I saw your pictures Debbie! You radiated pride in those pictures and looked great too. Congratulations again! I'm thrilled for you.