Need a chuckle & motivation to exercise today?

[lisarah]

I did. My personal fav: ellen's quote (luv me some cinnamon buns )
Even if you've heard them beofre, i hope one of these makes you smile!

I really don't think I need buns of steel. I'd be happy with buns of cinnamon.
-Ellen DeGeneres

My idea of exercise is a good brisk sit.
-Phyllis Diller

Whenever I feel like exercise, I lie down until the feeling passes.
-Robert M. Hutchins

Exercise... the poor person's plastic surgery
-Unknown

I was going to wake up early and go jogging, but my toes voted against me 10 to 1.
-Randy Glasbergen

Aerobics: a series of strenuous exercises which help convert fats, sugars, and starches into aches, pains, and cramps.
-Unknown

I consider exercise vulgar. It makes people smell.
-Alec Yuill Thornton

If your dog is fat, you're not getting enough exercise.
-Unknown

I believe that the Good Lord gave us a finite number of heartbeats and I'm damned if I'm going to use up mine running up and down a street.
-Neil Armstrong

The only exercise some people get is jumping to conclusions, running down their friends, side-stepping responsibility, and pushing their luck!
-Unknown

I met a friend jogging in the park. Well, he was jogging and I was sitting on a bench

When I was younger, I looked forward to getting up early in the morning to exercise. Now, getting out of bed in the morning is my exercise

You know that you’re out of shape when you can’t pull supermarket shopping carts apart

Don’t forget, your brain needs exercise, too. So, spend lots of time thinking up excuses for not working out

I prefer sit-ups to jumping jacks. At least I get to lie down after each one

The Gym has no confidence in me. The first machine the health club put me on was the respirator

My exercise club can get extremely busy. If all the exercise machines are in use, I usually wait in the snack bar and have a chocolate sundae until it’s my turn.

I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them

I joined a health club on an exercise special, I spent about $39 every month and haven't lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up?

I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me.

I don't jog... it makes the beer jump right out of my glass.

Does running late count as exercise?

So does that mean that being part of the human race does not count as exercise?


Lisa
who may have to change her signature line to something about buns of cinnamon
(credit to horsemom2 - i love when your changing signature lines!)

I have to exercise in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing.
-Marsha Doble

[bee]

Fun -- thanks for the chuckles!

[Fidget Queen]

Funny! My dad makes very similar remarks when we try to get him to be active! His favorite:

You guys push me around all the time! I get all the exercise I need defending myself.

[Usia]

Thanks for the chuckle, Lisa!

[paideiamom]

Thanks! That was fun.

[ooty]

Thank you.

That is why Neil Armstrong sauntered on to the moon.

[ckfromca]

Thanks for sharing!

[andtckrtoo]

These are hysterical!!!

I had the real honor of meetin Neil Armstrong - he's in excellent shape for his age and for someone who does not work out! Very nice and humble.

If your dog is fat, you're not getting enough exercise.
-Unknown

That one reminded me of getting two of my foster dogs - they were FAT. Walking them was kind of embarrassing as I kept thinking of this phrase. Fortunately, with diet and exercise (hikes and lots and lots of walks), they dropped weight. Jackie, who is a foster failure weight 50 pounds when I got him. He is now slim and trim at 35.

[acey]

The ironic thing about the cute Ellen quote is that she is actually in great physical shape. Considering that she's had video workout stars on her show, and has her pulse on the beat of the exercise gadget world, I'd speculate that she works out to videos...