Video Fitness Forum  

Go Back   Video Fitness Forum > Video Fitness Reader Forum > General Discussion

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 01-12-19, 10:09 AM  
hch
VF Supporter
 
Join Date: Mar 2002
Quote:
Originally Posted by toaster View Post
It was the "thrilled" that I didn't like. I think I'm generally pretty body positive (I might say slightly negative things about myself in my head sometimes but would never do so in front of others), but "thrilled"? I usually feel fine when I look in the mirror; to me, the idea of being "thrilled" is to put too much weight on appearance the opposite way.
I'll have more to add to this thread later, but I want to share this first.

https://www.emilyfonnesbeck.com/what...dy-positivity/

I agree with at least much of it, such as how it begins:

Quote:
It’s really easy to think that a positive body image means looking in the mirror and liking what you see. This belief will only limit you, keeping you stuck in the idea that body positivity is related to appearance.

Instead, body positivity has much more to do with how you care for, respect and connect with your body’s needs while cultivating gratitude for what it can do, or what it can allow you to do. It’s very likely that your body shape and size will change multiple times throughout your life and if you attach or cling to one certain image, you’ll lack acceptance while feeling powerless and frustrated.
I've also thought of the concept of attachment or clinging to a certain image as one part of what I'd like to avoid in instructors' language. (I found this page looking for a phrase that I may use in a future thread, which may be more general or may be mainly about a specific site that appears to be largely better than the usual.)
__________________
"It doesn't happen all at once," said the Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."

The Velveteen Rabbit
hch is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-12-19, 11:36 AM  
JackieB
VF Supporter
 
JackieB's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Minnesota
Quote:
Originally Posted by susan p View Post
I think one thing that contributes to a positive body image is simply not to focus on your body. Sometimes I think the more obsessed we are with how we feel about our body, the worse off we are. I don't really want to love my body. I don't know what love my body means. I want to be grateful for it and appreciate it, but I don't want to spend any mental/emotional energy on what it looks like. (I DO, sometimes, but I consider that unfortunate when it happens!)

Face it, aren't most bodies are "ugly"? They are scarred and bruised and funny-shaped, with skin that has wrinkles and cellulite and wobbles. Think of a naked human as being the alien in a movie. I think we would be pretty horrifying aliens! At the same time, the people inside the bodies can be so dang beautiful and tough and strong and sensitive and just lovely.


I think focusing on what your body can do instead of what it looks like is a key to appreciating its wonder.
I totally agree with this, Susan. Everything. I know we all want to look our best.....but honestly the important thing is feeling and doing our best. I'm so past all this stuff with our shell. That is what our body is, our shell.

I saw a quote on social media about what kind of legacy we're leaving. "Nobody is going to stand up at your funeral and say you had a tiny waist and great thigh gap".

I want to live well, be active and do what I want to do in life, comfortably and with ease. Keep up with my family and participate in life. I love my workouts but I'm not married to them...I'm committed to my husband, family and friends.

I'm so over all the rest of it.
__________________
Jackie

Certified Essentrics Instructor, Level 4---February 2017
Yoga Tune Up Roll Model Method Practitioner---December 2021

"Movement is a privilege. You don't have to exercise. You get to exercise. Visit a person whose mobility is severely limited, and you'll appreciate the distinction. Do what you can, count yourself lucky, heal yourself in the process." Essentrics Colorado
JackieB is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-12-19, 01:40 PM  
toaster
Exchange Moderator
 
toaster's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Western NY
Henry, thanks for reviving this thread. I haven't yet read the article you included, but from the links you posted, it seems much closer to what I believe. As Jackie also implied, looks just really aren't that important!!! No need to "love" how we look in the mirror or to be "thrilled" about it; it is what it is, and it's a pretty minor issue in the grand scheme of things--better to look in the mirror in the mirror and observe that you are strong, kind, generous, a good friend, etc.
__________________
Beth aka Toaster (she/her)

Follow me @YogiBethC

YouTube|Instagram|Facebook
And yes, I am Reviewer Dr. Beth on Amazon.
toaster is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-22-19, 05:03 AM  
Leela
VF Supporter
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Question Growing up looking different smashed my self confidence

I was told by my fellow grade schoolers that my brown skin was the color of dirt.
(New England, 70s and early 80s)
It took me years and years to overcome that.

Going to India to visit family was also hard due to colorism imposed by years of colonialism

It’s all well and good to try to live in a place of self care, but so many times we are harmed before we can even make those choices for ourselves
Leela is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-22-19, 09:57 AM  
Juliepie
VF Supporter
 
Juliepie's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Chicagoland, IL, USA
Quote:
Originally Posted by Leela View Post
I was told by my fellow grade schoolers that my brown skin was the color of dirt.
(New England, 70s and early 80s)
It took me years and years to overcome that.

Going to India to visit family was also hard due to colorism imposed by years of colonialism

It’s all well and good to try to live in a place of self care, but so many times we are harmed before we can even make those choices for ourselves
I'm so sorry you went through that, Leela. <<hugs>>
__________________
--Julie

Surely a person of sense would submit to anything, like exercise, so as to obtain a well functioning mind and a pleasant, happy life. --Socrates
Juliepie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-22-19, 10:06 AM  
toaster
Exchange Moderator
 
toaster's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: Western NY
Me too, Leela; I can't imagine.
__________________
Beth aka Toaster (she/her)

Follow me @YogiBethC

YouTube|Instagram|Facebook
And yes, I am Reviewer Dr. Beth on Amazon.
toaster is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-22-19, 03:47 PM  
VainJane
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Seattle, WA
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pat58 View Post
That - and "She has such a pretty face, if only she would lose weight." Those things stick like glue to a developing psyche.
And then, when you do lose a bit of weight, some of the same people (including your mother) tell you that your face isn't as pretty anymore.

(That was when I was growing from my teens into my twenties and my face morphed from its "baby" roundness to a more pronounced bone structure. I happen to like my face that way, thank you very much.)

And Leela, so sorry to hear what you had to go through growing up in New England. I shudder to think how "socially acceptable" overt racism was only a few decades ago.
VainJane is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
body image, self image

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -5. The time now is 06:22 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.3
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
© 2009 Video Fitness