Moms of school-aged kids and tweenagers, April-June 2021

[TonyaK]

Hello, friends!

Pratima, I'm so sorry for your loss. Is DH waiting for the J&J still? I hope he can get it soon so you can visit his dad! I hope some good things will happen so you don't feel like life is just bad things - I hate that feeling so f*ing much. Sending hugs. Is there any sitcom that always makes you laugh? Or a positive book you can go back to, to try to balance it out? It's so smart that you are seeing people and working out - those are probably the best warriors against depression/feeling down/funk. Can you avoid the news for a while?

I'm glad you had a good trip to Reno! What fun to go with just DD and have that time together, outside of the house.

I've been doing Chalean Xtreme, the Push month. That's the heaviest weights with the lowest rep count, my favorite. I'm not doing the cardio since my knees and legs don't want to jump that much. My "good" knee now hurts, too. I'm sure I've been putting more weight and work onto it to protect the "bad" one. I found a great Turbo Jam for me, with really controlled jumping, so I've been doing that. It's Cardio Party Remix 2, if anyone else needs it!

I hope everyone is doing okay!

[Pratima]

TonyaK, that's a bummer about your knees. Does it only bother you when you work out, or other times too? I remember a VFer saying she found heavy weights meditative. I felt that way about Body Beast, though after a while his comments became distracting.

The funeral yesterday was of course sad. I somehow felt more sad about my friend's death than my mom's, maybe because he was so young and she seemed at peace once she passed. Anyway, I went to lunch with a group of high school friends after, and then had a long car chat with my high school BFF (she lives in the metro Phoenix area but a good hour's drive away). While I was complaining up a storm to her, I felt SO much better after.

DH got his shot already, actually the day after he had symptoms. His dad hasn't though, and was going to get the J&J because then he'd only need the one. I know the Walmart near their house has Moderna now. He's very...well, he's on oxygen full-time and can't walk around much. I'm wondering whether drive-thru pharmacies might do the shots where he doesn't even have to get out.

But on a related note, I'm letting go of all that. I'm happy to find plane tickets and all, but leaving it up to DH to a) convince his dad to get the shot and possibly figure out where and b) tell me to get the plane tickets.

That feels like part of my problem--I'm so much a part of EVERYTHING that I'm overwhelmed. DD's tween attitude when she's asked to do something, having to arrange everything for everyone, not having much time, something has to give, you know?

Good idea about a book! I've been watching Schitt's Creek lately. It is so absurd yet funny and sometimes sweet, it does seem to help.

I've been trying to find a counselor to see. I had a bad experience last time I saw one, all of them seem quite busy, and it's tough to find someone who takes my insurance. It's yet another challenge! I may have found one though, and hopefully that will help.

Life sometimes just is bad, isn't it? And the good is either in the past or future. It just becomes hard to look back or forward. I don't really look at the news much. Isolating is bad for me I know. I'm not a big group kind of person, so being with my one friend or seeing a couple of ladies like I did this weekend is really nice.

We're heading up north tomorrow night. I booked a house a while ago and forgot I'd booked for Th-Su. That will hopefully be a nice getaway. And I'm going to have lunch today with one woman who flew in from WA for the funeral and my high school BFF.

Hanging in there! Hope everyone else is too.

[Donna D]

Happy Birthday Pratima! Hope you enjoyed your special day!

I hope you and your family are all feeling well. Sorry to read about your friend passing.

[Pratima]

Originally Posted by Donna D

Happy Birthday Pratima! Hope you enjoyed your special day!

I hope you and your family are all feeling well. Sorry to read about your friend passing.

Thank you!

Last week was actually really good. The funeral was sad, of course. Six of my high school classmates were there so we sat together and had lunch afterward, which was amazing. The following day I had lunch with the two women who'd been there. One is my high school BFF and she lives in the area but an hour's drive away so I haven't seen her in over a year. Despite spending some time seriously venting to her, I felt SO MUCH BETTER after seeing everyone.

Thursday night we drove up north. I rented a nice house for my birthday weekend. We haven't gone anywhere in months because DS's carsickness seems to have gotten worse. He did OK though, and we had a good trip. The house was quite a bit out of town and perfect for a family vacation. Three bedrooms and two baths, lots of kitchen stuff, games, puzzles, and even a pool table and ping pong table in the garage.

The first day I took a walk on Forest Service land and got lost! I knew where the house was but couldn't get through all the fences. Ended up going up to a house and getting a ride from a little old lady in a red pickup truck. We went on two hikes, had some good food, saw another one of my high school friends, and stopped in Sedona on the way home to have lunch with DH's cousin who lives in CA and is here on vacation.

I had such a feeling of "why do bad things keep happening??" before. DS even said that when we all got sick. Last week I guess lots of good things happened. Now I just have to figure out how to hold on to the good things feeling, I guess.

I'm taking DD to the ortho today. Her knee has been bugging her. I'm assuming it's a stress fracture, but we'll see. The ortho is a 45 minute drive. I picked her because she's a former gymnast and really could. I hope this only requires one appointment!

I am enjoying the early sunrises, but it's supposed to be 98 today! Our new pool should be ready this weekend.

[TonyaK]

Hi all! I hope everyone is well!

Pratima, I'm glad you had a good week!! It sounds nice to go somewhere different. I feel good vicariously from hearing that a stranger stopped to give you a ride - the kindness of strangers is a huge mood-booster for me. I hope the better feelings last for a long time!

I've been continuing with CLX Push month (just the weight workouts). I have been dabbling with a DailyOM class on fascia stretching, and I did the hamstrings and IT band segments yesterday and I feel good (and surprisingly muscle-sore). I'm going to try to do a couple of lower body parts each day and see if it helps my legs and knees. Something feels so tight around my left knee, it seems like different kinds of stretching might help.

I hope your DD's knee will be easy to diagnose and treat. Did you like the ortho?
My kids are waking up super early because of the sun rising earlier. And it's staying light later, so they don't want to go to bed, but then they're tired in the morning.

Yesterday, the neighbor kids told me that they can stay out until it gets dark. They are 10 and 8. I said, "that's 9:00!" and the girl nodded enthusiastically. I told my kids that they had to be back by 6:00 (it's a school night!). DD was disappointed because she wanted to keep riding bikes and playing with them. At around 8:00, when we were making our kids get in the shower and get ready for bed, the dad from next door came over and rang the doorbell. DH asked, "You lose your kids?" and he said, "Yeah. Kristen's pissed." I just laughed, out of sight. I bet she was more than pissed. The wife is super watchful and does not give the kids much opportunity to run loose outside. The husband is much more free-range and will let them stay out for hours and ride their bikes a lot farther away. I'm sure the two "missing" ones were just out riding around, believing they could stay out until sunset. Our neighborhood is suburban and feels pretty safe. The girl is like a little grown-up, very responsible and not a risk-taker. I did not feel worried about her. We offered to both go driving around, looking for them, but he declined. Nothing else happened, so I'm sure they are fine.
It's interesting to see how other families work, and to think about freedom vs. safety, and it gives us ways to talk to our kids about our family's rules and how to make decisions. We are somewhere in between the husband and wife - we let them play outside a lot, but they have limits on how far they can go and they have to check in often. They each have a phone and we can track their locations on Google maps. That's working for us right now.

I'm so excited for you to have a pool!! My kids would be thrilled. They really missed going to pools last summer. I'm not sure what that will look like this year. I know our neighborhood pool's plan was to have limited capacity and reservations needed. Now that the CDC recommendations have changed, maybe it will just be open like normal and it might feel too crowded for me, with all the unvaccinated kids (and plenty of adults, I'm sure).

I'm glad your DH got his shot! I'm sorry to hear about his dad. I hope he will be able to get vaccinated so DH or all of you can visit. My DH made an appointment for his brother in another state They were texting and the brother didn't want to go through the trouble, but DH looked online and immediately found a J&J appt the next day and signed him up. The brother is a truck driver and doesn't always know where he'll be in two weeks, so the one-shot J&J was really helpful.

[Pratima]

TonyaK, I actually knocked on the woman's door! I wandered into her yard because I was able to open the gate on one side when I came in from the forest land. Thank goodness I knocked on her door and not someone else's.

My kids almost always have to be home by 6 PM for dinner. They will sometimes ask if they can play after (always with the boys who live around the corner) and we'll let them, but usually only until 7 or so. They don't have phones but don't really leave our block. DS has ridden his bike around the neighborhood before. Honestly I'm a little freaked out about it but I did that at his age and our neighborhood was waaaay bigger and had no sidewalks or anything. There's certainly a lot of trust in him, our neighborhood, and drivers there, maybe more than I should have!

Our neighborhood pool did eventually open last summer and I did take the kids a few times. We always went in the morning when there was rarely anyone there. We mostly swam at the neighbor's though, so it will be awesome to have our pool!

This is the first summer ever the kids will be home and we'll be working. Last summer of course they were here but I was off. Their plan for now is to swim daily! I signed DS up for a 3 day cooking workshop June 1-3. I need to figure out some other things. They will definitely do chores daily!

I took DD to the ortho. We saw her before for DD's wrist, after it had healed but was still bugging her a little. It's a 45 minute drive but I do love this doctor. She's a former gymnast herself so asks a ton of very detailed, specific questions and is very specific with her requirements. DD basically has irritation from overuse and will start physical therapy next week. That will be closer to home with the PT I've seen. His daughter is a gymnast and he's a triathlete so I think it should work!

My kids have three more days of school!

TonyaK, I was at DD's gymnastics banquet last night. No masks, at the bowling alley which also has an arcade and laser tag. There were about 200 people there and it was a little weird. If DD and I hadn't both been sick already I probably wouldn't have gone. I still have this feeling things might get bad again. Like a booster shot will probably be required and will it be readily available? DD is eligible for the shot now but I'm waiting a bit since she has natural immunity. I'll probably take her in next month so she can get both shots before school starts again.

I've been doing streaming Burn Bootcamp workouts. I think anyone can access them. I am SO sore from one this week! I'm also trying to get outside before it gets really hot. It has been around 100 but still cools off at night, thank goodness.

Hi to Stephanie, mbramer, and anyone else who might be lurking!

[TonyaK]

Hello!!

Just in case you are curious, those neighbor kids were found, safe and sound. The husband seems to be still chastened at telling them they could stay out until dark.

We are working on figuring out what works with our kids. They each have a phone, and we can track them with Google Maps and can call and text them. Still, we want them to let us know if they switch to playing with other kids. Sometimes they will start out with one set of kids and then find some other friends and the first ones go home. I try to explain why we care about that - because I might call that parent or go to their house if I can't track down my kids. If they know the reasoning behind it, maybe it will help them to make decisions.

BTW, the oldest child next door knows darn well that her mom would never let her stay out that late on a school night - she was ornery and kind of took advantage of her dad's hands-off parenting style.

I have finished the Push month of CLX! I did it in the prescribed amount of time! I only did the strength workouts!

I exercised on 18/31 days in May, which is a lot more than I've done for a long time! I keep aiming to do something every day, but I'm glad that I actually got more than 50% this month! Maybe in June I can do at least 19 days.

I keep trying different types of rehab/PT type of stuff for my knee, and I think it is helping, but it's taking time. When I do the CLX workouts, I use a stretchy knee brace and that makes me feel secure to use heavy weights. I've been keeping my cardio low-impact (and I haven't been doing much - unintentionally). I also don't do twisty cardio. The Firm's stepford wife style is sometimes perfect

Today I'm going to start the Burn month from CLX. I love the length (~35 minutes) and they're straightforward enough that I can mute Chalene and listen to a podcast if I want to. I only need to hear about Toni's 7 kids a couple times - haha!

Pratima,
I think we are going to go to a kid's birthday party at a trampoline place in a few weeks. I'm a little nervous about it, but I really want to see the parents. They used to be our next door neighbors but they moved a few years ago. I hope the odds will be in our favor and the kids won't be spreading covid. I haven't been in a place like that since February of 2020. I bet it will feel super weird!
I hope DD is healing well!
I'm glad you found that nice woman to give you a ride! That was great luck to stumble upon a kind person

[TonyaK]

Hi friends!

I've been doing a little bit of exercise (walks and stretching mostly) but finally did a CLX last night after dinner. I never got that into it and sort of wished I were doing a different workout, but I got it done. It was only 35 minutes, so I knew I could stick it out

We went to the birthday party at the kids' activities place - Urban Air. The kids loved it! DD drove go karts for at least an hour and DS climbed everything he could. There is a parkour course where they fall into a ball pit and swim out and I imagined each ball as a germ of pink eye, a cold, the flu, etc... So far, no illnesses! The birthday family are our old neighbors and it was nice to see them. The birthday boy was DD's first friend It felt extremely weird to be in a germy kids' place!

I hope everyone is well!

[Nuggie's Auntie]

Hi Friends! Just popping in for a quick hello. I will try to catch up later on today. I have to go do my yoga and get it out of the way before the day gets away from me. Hope all are well!

[Pratima]

Jumping in because June is almost over!

TonyaK that's pretty extreme for a first big outing! We were in Manitou at the arcade on Saturday and I was astonished by the number of young children there. I know they tend to not get very sick with COVID but there were a lot of older people too!

Stephanie, any chance you'll visit anytime soon? You know, while it's blazing hot?

I'm having a rough month. I've had a cough on and off for 6 months. Took antibiotics in January, steroids, in February, was OK for a while and then got COVID in April. Cough started up again and I ended up seeing a new allergist 3 weeks ago. Finishing up 3 weeks of antibiotics and 5 days of steroids and STILL coughing. So now they'll do some imaging and in the meanwhile I am so exhausted.

I'm also having some weird hormonal stuff--my period started 3.5 weeks after the previous one and is now on day TWELVE. My gyno is of course on vacation for 2 weeks so the MA is supposed to talk to another doctor and get back to me.We were in CO last week, finally visiting the in-laws. My FIL seems to be declining rather quickly. He's had COPD forever and been on oxygen 24/7 for years. He seems a lot more frail than when we saw him 2 years ago, and is starting to have memory and other cognitive issues. Every single morning, he would get up and basically harangue DS about speaking and reading Chinese. He couldn't seem to understand that the kids learn Mandarin and he speaks Cantonese. The written characters are the same, but they're learning a new, simplified version and can't read the characters he shows them. DS was quite patient but it didn't make for a fun trip.

We didn't really do anything but sit around the house a lot. They don't even have Internet so my kids were stuck playing board games and whatever they could do on their tablets without that. I had hoped to do some paddleboarding but all we managed was one outing to the bowling alley and one to a park.

We're heading to ATL July 10-17 to visit my dad and grandma and I'd really like be healthy before that!

On a positive note, an old friend of mine is coming to visit next week and I am looking forward to seeing her. I've been doing rowing workouts again and really enjoying those. There are a lot of wildfires here and with this cough, I don't want to be outside or with others much so am making use of all my indoor workout options!