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Old 08-05-21, 07:46 PM  
Sollamyn
 
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Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: S. Illinois
This is such a difficult time in history for making any type of meaningful plan, it seems. My brother-in-law died in March 2020 and they just had a brief outdoor funeral at the cemetery. My sister and his (adult) children really wanted to do some sort of remembrance/memorial service for him at some point, but now I don't think that will ever happen. It just seems so wrong! I know this probably doesn't help to know this, but there are others who are sharing your pain. You are not alone! ((HUGS))

I hope all goes well for a celebration of your husband's life in March.

Donna
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Old 08-05-21, 08:40 PM  
Laura S.
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Location: Raleigh, NC
Sherry - I'm so sorry for the complete tone deafness on people's part, people who should have a vested interest in celebrating Frank's life. I hope whatever happens with the celebration of his life that you can remember your good times with him. It's always hard to grieve, but this is such a strange and unsettling time on top of that.
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Old 08-06-21, 07:02 AM  
cyana
 
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(((Hugs))) to you, Sherry. I am so sorry you are dealing with these responses on top of your grief and your desire to honor Frank's life. Please know you will always be supported by your VF family.
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Old 08-06-21, 07:47 AM  
Demeris
 
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Sherry, I'm so sorry these people have let you and Frank down. We live in perilous times, where the distractions and entertainment and trivia of daily life steal our hearts and shift our attention away from what is truly important—other people.

I wish I could give you a big hug in person.
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Old 08-06-21, 08:40 AM  
ddj
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Sherry! I've been gone for almost a year and didn't realize what you've been going through. I'm so sorry for your loss.

This pandemic has shined a spotlight on how unfeeling people can be. I've suffered no loss and I still grow angry at the disregard people have for others. So I can only imagine what it's been like for you. I'm glad you have your son and a place here to vent.

(((hugs)))
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Old 08-06-21, 08:54 AM  
ellaenchanted
 
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I am so sorry. Go on with your plans for the memorial.
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Old 08-06-21, 09:09 AM  
nyskier
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Sherry-

I am so sorry to hear this. The selfishness of people in today's world is really terrible. I hope we can support you here.
Best,

Lori
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Old 08-06-21, 09:43 AM  
Vintage VFer
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Sherry, I am so sorry that you are having to go through even more heartache. (((HUGS)))

If not for VF, and a few good folks I know, I would totally despair at the selfish and stupid behavior of others.
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Old 08-06-21, 09:48 AM  
amoodygirl
 
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Join Date: Nov 2006
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Oh Sherry, the older I get, the more disappointed I become in people.

I want to attend Frank's Celebration of his Life and am glad you postponed it. I kept thinking, hmmmm.... October.... this Delta variant raising its ugly head....

As I have studied in my Buddhist practices, one cannot be disappointed if one has no expectations. This is a HARD lesson and one I haven't been able to put into practice.

With that said, the people who are really there for you - and were there for Frank - will be there.

Sending you tons of hugs, kiddo.
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Old 08-06-21, 11:15 AM  
edensmom
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
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I'm so sorry you are hurting. I'm glad you are able to vent here. Grief is so isolating, isn't it.
As s fellow widow, I found it is so disorienting seeing other people move on with their lives when your own life has been ripped away without warning. People do grieve in their own ways, but true colors are also revealed. (In my case what was really important to people and it seems to be money .)
Hang in there!
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