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Old 11-01-14, 03:32 AM  
Negin
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
OT ~ Going Gray (as gracefully as possible)

I'm on the fence as to whether to start dying my hair or not. I currently use Lush Henna (Caca Noir - black). At first, I was thrilled with the results. Now, a year later, I'm not as thrilled as I was initially. My hair gets quite frizzy. Obviously, the grays are the frizziest. I would love your opinions and thoughts as to whether I should dye my hair or not. My hair is dark brown (almost black). It seems to me that blonds go gray/silver more beautifully than brunettes.

My reasons for not wanting to dye my hair:
* possibly less damage from all the chemicals of dying over time. I knew a lady in her 80s who had the absolute most amazing hair. She told me that she never dyed it,/used chemicals on her hair and seldom used a blow dryer - her hair was thick and gorgeous.
* as someone somewhere mentioned, "there is something odd looking when the look of a face or a neck is somewhere within the 5th or 6th decade of life and the hair is attempting to replicate a twenty-something.

I have read these tips so far:

Mild Silver Shampoo - recommendations? I prefer to use sulfate-free shampoos.

Using a yellowish-tinged shampoo or conditioner rather than a clear one may leave a yellowing cast on your hair.

Chlorine in water reacts with sunlight to give a yellow tinge.

Occasional color correction with a blue tinted hair product- to cancel yellowing - recommendations?

If anyone has any more tips/resources on how to go gray as gracefully as possible, please share . And again, I'd love your thoughts as to whether I should eventually dye my hair or not.
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Old 11-01-14, 05:52 AM  
horsemom2
 
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: NJ
I dyed my hair for several years and it really only looked good the first two weeks before the roots started showing. I hated the process and wound up wearing hats most of the time to hide the roots. Then I finally just let it grow out and really loved how it looked. However I still wear hats most of the time! LOL

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Old 11-01-14, 06:09 AM  
Jeanne Marie
 
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Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Atlanta, Ga.
There really is an art to not looking odd with dark hair as we age. I am always fearful of ending up looking like "Elvira"! Ha ha!

I am 58 and dye the roots of my black hair. In my youth, it was blackest black. Now I dye it somewhere in the neighborhood of a dark-ish brown so that it doesn't look too harsh against my skin.

I think hair texture has so much to do with whether you can go gray and look good doing it. It also has a lot to do with how the dye affects your hair. I have naturally curly, thick hair. Dying my hair helps the texture. It smooths the hair shaft, getting rid of the frizzies better than if I let my hair go gray. I am not one of those lucky people who would have that beautiful, silky looking silver hair. If I was, I wouldn't hesitate to let it go gray. So for me, it's as much about changing the texture of my gray, as it is changing the color.

I am fortunate, however, in that with my hair being curly, you don't see the roots as easily. I can go about 5-6 weeks between coloring before it becomes noticeable. Even then, it's only really noticeable when I pull my hair back straight off my face.

I do wonder what I'll do as I get even older. I agree that it just looks odd to see a 70 something (or older) year old woman with too dark hair. Lighter haired people definitely age more gracefully in regard to hair color. I figure I'll just go lighter brown as I age.

I saw an article online the other day that said red headed people don't go gray. I never realized that, but I have a red headed friend who is 60, and she doesn't have a strand of gray hair on her head!
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Old 11-01-14, 07:34 AM  
Demeris
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
I decided to go grey last spring. I'm about 80% grey on the sides and about 60% on the top--I have no idea how much grey I have in the back.

I colored my hair, for the very last time, in May. I also got a very short shag (I googled hair styles for women over 50 and found some pictures of Jane Fonda and Lisa Rinna, and took those to a Great Clips).

I was out of state for two months during the summer, traveling for consulting work, and the cut hid the roots (and I've been coloring my hair dark brown for the last six or seven years).

When I got back to AZ, I went back to the same woman at Great Clips, and I've gone in every 4 weeks, to keep the cut short as the roots grow out.

I bought some hats to wear in public to hide the two tone hair, but I haven't bothered wearing them. I also toyed with getting a wig to wear while my hair is two tone but decided that was too costly.

Frankly, my cut is adorable and looks polished. It's only my roots that look frumpy and awkward. At the end of November, the roots will be gone, and all my hair will be au naturel.

My grey hairs (they're more silver than grey) are stronger and more willful than what remains of my natural brown hair, but the texturizing my hair stylist does makes them work with the cut.

I'll toy with a new hairdo when I get all the colored hair gone. Right now, I love the cut and suspect I'll love it more when I get this last 3/4 of an inch of color that remains cut off.
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Old 11-01-14, 07:49 AM  
susan p
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Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: Kansas City
Red-haired people do go gray. My dad was a carrot-top, had fiery red hair, and he grayed late, but he did gray. His hair was "cinnamon sugar" instead of "salt and pepper." lol.
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Old 11-01-14, 08:09 AM  
alisoncooks
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: TarHeel country
I'm a very dark brunette but I'm starting to gray heavily around the temples. I've decided that, frankly, I'm just too lazy to bother with coloring it, LOL. Both of my parents (by their early 50s) were mostly salt with just a touch of pepper. I figure I've got another decade or so b/f I catch up with them.

Interesting to see how others approach it and why. I do have to say, my grays are more silvery than yellowy. I quite like them except that they're so darn unruly and tend to stick straight out when they're short.
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Old 11-01-14, 08:24 AM  
cherimac
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Georgia
Quote:
Originally Posted by susan p View Post
Red-haired people do go gray. My dad was a carrot-top, had fiery red hair, and he grayed late, but he did gray. His hair was "cinnamon sugar" instead of "salt and pepper." lol.
My husband is a red head and 53. He is definitely graying.
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Old 11-01-14, 08:43 AM  
Orlita
 
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Join Date: Dec 2006
I'm a natural redhead -- carrot red as a child and more auburn with strawberry blonde highlights later (now 50). I am lucky I have never had to dye my hair. I played with henna in my 20s on occasion. But as my fine but wavy/curly hair texture has changed (the grays are more kinky and overall it's more dry), I want to baby it as much as possible (Lush Curly Wurly and Aveda Dry Remedy Masque are my current daily favorites).

I hadn't thought until recently about how much easier it is to go gray from my hair tone. Depending on the type of light I'm in, the gray is hardly noticeable. In the sun it just looks like silvery highlights.

Anyway.....for very dark hair, perhaps doing lighter colored highlights as the gray initially comes in would make them blend more?
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Old 11-01-14, 11:23 AM  
suzannaerin
 
Join Date: Feb 2002
Location: Arlington, VA
I went from single-process color (red) to natural (light brown w/about 60% grey) several years ago. Quite frankly, I hate the whole salon vibe, wasting that time sitting around waiting for the color to process--even in a steamer--and the expense. To ease the transition, my stylist used a semi-permanent color but I still had a bit of a line between the natural and color for about 8 months.

Orlita and I think alike!!! Recently, I went back to have some golden blonde highlights added to tone down the remaining brown because it was feeling drab. I only have to get it refreshed every 3-4 months, so it does not require a lot of time/money. I'm going to do this until I'm almost 100% grey, then I'm going to stop. Luckily, I have a really pretty grey---sparkly silver that's pure white. If I could color it all that sparkly white now, I would!!!

I highly recommend going natural.
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Old 11-01-14, 11:27 AM  
beyond.omega
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Join Date: Dec 2006
I think whether you dye your hair or not should be based on how dying/not dying makes you feel when you look at yourself in the mirror. I think its a bad idea to worry about what other people say...especially when the source isn't even traceable to someone you know. I also think you shouldn't compare yourself to that lady. I'll bet she always had a beautiful mane of thick beautiful hair even as a child. I have never used chemicals on my hair...had a blowout twice in my life, and still I had fine 2a-c frizzy hair until I started using henna. It's still fine 2a-c, but now it looks fabulous. But that's just my hair.

That being said, I'm sorry the Lush Henna is giving you frizzy hair. If it's frizz that is your only concern, maybe some troubleshooting? Henna has been the best thing that has happened to my hair for manageability and even after years, doing two stage hendigo for black hair has still continued to give me fabulous results after a lifetime of frizzy hair. However, even now, a week after I henna, I get some dryness in my hair. So on my off week, I do a little bit of oil treatment. Basically, apply oil to my wet hair the night before and shampoo/condition as usual the next morning.

HTH.
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