04-24-15, 12:21 PM | |
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Michigan
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I have been with my hubby for over 42 years and him and I are opposites like you said you and your boyfriend are with sleeping habits. My DH snores and also has RLS. He seems to have RLS more when he consumes caffeine at night. He stopped drinking caffeine in the afternoon and evening, so his RLS doesn't happen as often. Also, he goes to bed after I am sleeping since I get up really early to work out. The key for us is he comes in the room quietly and no snuggling and is considerate of not flashing any lights in the room. He walks in the dark room and does fine with that. He would NEVER want to sleep separately either, so we compromised.
I think your boyfriend should listen to your concerns and take the time to think about how this is affecting you and not just think about himself. Relationships are all about giving and not just taking and wanting things your own way. It sounds like you love him and are willing to compromise, so let's hope he will reciprocate and let you get your much needed rest and sleep. Cheryl
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Currently filming rebounder workouts with fascinating ways to use the rebounder that I never dreamed of coming up with. It's been a blast to have some YouTube videos. |
04-24-15, 12:29 PM | |
Join Date: Apr 2002
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I feel your pain. I love my dh very much and we've been married over 25 years. We still enjoy doing activities together, eat dinner together every night as a family and are intimate. However, we sleep separately. How bad does he snore? He went on a fishing trip many years ago and the guys who went with him formed a line and individually shook my hand when he got back from his trip. Everyone in his family has this issue, even his slim and fit sister.
The one thing I considered but didn't try is purchasing two extra long adjustable single beds. They equal the size of a king size bed but when he moves around in his sleep, he won't shake you because your mattresses are separate. Plus you can get a base that raises and lowers the head. For some who snore, raising their head stops it. My dh is so loud that even with earplugs in a closed room next door, he can wake me at times. He even wears nasal strips, which make him breath well but doesn't stop his snoring. So this was my only solution because it was really affecting my health and my wellbeing. Now we are much happier, as a couple and individually. Just make sure you continue to have a close relationship and activities together. He will adjust if you present it as a normal, healthy solution. And yes we do cuddle together just like Shammy and Kitten, too. The way you get him used to it is you buy a single mattress and put in in another room, if you have a spare room. Then if he wakes you, you just go to it and go to sleep. It will be much nicer than a couch. If you don't have a spare room, slide it under your bed and pull it out if you have to. Then at least he won't be shaking you and you can put your earplugs in. After a while he will see that you are still intimate together and close and he will accept it. My dh didn't want me to do it either but then he saw how exhausted I was and once he saw how much happier I was, he accepted it. HTH Casey |
04-24-15, 01:50 PM | |
Exchange Moderator
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: Phoenix, AZ
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I feel so much better reading all these posts! I've been married for 12 years, my DH snores and also has RLS and won't go to a sleep study. He also works overnights so his sleep cycle is all messed up.
In some ways, it's better that he goes to bed later because if I'm asleep when he gets there, the snoring doesn't always bother me. He sometimes sleeps in the guest room if we've gone a couple of nights where he's snoring a lot (waking me up) and I'm worn out. I always felt for that somehow, but all these posts have shown me it's not a horrible thing to want sleep! And IMO, if he won't go to a doctor, then he should be the one to sleep elsewhere. I <3 my bed!
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Don't care what people say, just follow your own way. -- Enigma, Return to Innocence DISCLOSURE: I have professional relationships with several producers of fitness videos and related products; please see my profile for details. |
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