Off-Topic For those who live in cold climates

rheash92 · 07-12-16, 09:43 AM

I have a question for those who live in extreme cold weather. We live in New York and I really hate the cold. My husband has to stay in this are since in his field there only jobs here. I keep getting depressed as the years pass by and my hope to move to someplace warm keeps dwindling. How do you handle the cold?

Do you spend a lot of time outdoors? I was thinking that I really am ok to spend my time indoors Im not that of an outdoors person anyways I do like tgo hiking but still its so hard just doing groceries or running errands in winter. Its so cold all the time. And so many of our friends are moving South. Just don't know what to do. I can't fathom the thought of living here all my life. Just getting depressed. Thanks!

eam531 · 07-12-16, 10:34 AM

We live in Buffalo NY. We retired here last year from Washington DC. My husband grew up in Buffalo. We visited many cities, including Buffalo, before we made our relocation decision, and have not regretted it for a moment.

In a northern climate, you really just have to embrace the idea that winters are going to be long and cold, but they are only one season out of four. Since you cannot change where you live, you'll need to change your mindset or you will be miserable.

Make sure you get enough light. Endless gray days can be really depressing. I spent a winter in Germany and it was pretty gray most of the time; sunny days felt like a real blessing. If you have not considered a light box for seasonal affective disorder, you might want to consider it. Also make sure you are getting enough calcium and vitamin D.

I would go stir crazy if I stayed indoors all the time in the winter. We belong to a gym and getting out of the house to exercise keeps us from getting cabin fever, as well as doing wonders for our physical and emotional health. On days when it was really too snowy to get to the gym, I worked out at home with videos. The area of Buffalo we live in (Kenmore/Town of Tonawanda) has excellent public works, so the streets get plowed right away. While we have a plow service for the driveway, we shovel our own walkways, which is very good exercise. The grocery store, bank, library, post office, and pharmacy, plus some restaurants and other shops, are all within a mile radius of our house, so we walk to those places in winter when it is not actively snowing (the rest of the year, we ride bikes). We go on walks around the neighborhood just for additional exercise. We do drive to the gym because of the gear we take with us (workout clothes and shower supplies).

I have Reynaud's syndrome, so I cannot spend hours in the cold skiing and so on, but I have very good boots and gloves and outerwear and have been able to cope with the cold even with my syndrome.

There can be a stark beauty in wintry weather that I appreciate. One of the best memories I have of this past winter was going to a nature preserve during a snowfall. We were the only people there and it was an unspoiled landscape. We saw several deer close-up and the ice and snow on the bare tree branches were beautiful. It was a great outing, and then we had hot chocolate afterwards, which was great too.

Try to make the best of where you live, since you can't change it at this point. Please don't make yourself unhappy.

kalliope999 · 07-12-16, 11:03 AM

Betsy had really great advice! Making peace with the fact of the weather, finding beauty in the snowy landscape, getting enough light and exercise to help your mood, and appreciating how the winter makes the other three seasons that much sweeter, can all help a lot.

I'd only add to make sure you have proper gear for being outdoors in the winter. I live in the Boston area now, but am originally from Cleveland. The winters are very similar, but we do a LOT more walking here than in Ohio. I'm out in the elements so much more. Are you in NYC or upstate? Not sure how often you need to walk for your errands. But it took me a while to realize that what I considered a proper winter coat in OH wasn't going to cut it for our lifestyle here.

We invested in very good down and/or technical coats. I prefer a longer one, since I find that having my rear and most of my thighs covered makes a big difference. Nice wool socks (knee highs when I can!), warm and comfortable boots or Danskos, good gloves or mittens, and cute hats that stay on and cover my ears (or a good hood) all help a lot.

Now that I'm prepared, the coldest weather is much more tolerable. Once I get walking I can actually get too warm in my coat and have to unzip a bit!

Lauracat · 07-12-16, 11:15 AM

To echo Kalliope999, are you sure you're dressing warmly enough for the outdoors? I'm in New York City, so I'm sure it's not as cold as upstate, but once it gets in the 20s I'm in long underwear, a warm hat, turtleneck, scarf (covering my face if necessary), my "super mittens" - you get the idea. Keeping my hands warm and cold air off my neck/head is critical, and is what allows me to still enjoy being outside and the bracing crispness of the winter.

donnamp · 07-12-16, 11:21 AM

I am not a big fan of winter either - and I live in MD/DC (like Betsy used to!) and this area is too cold for me in the winter, so I feel your pain!

But, I agree with Betsy, since you can't change it- you just have to accept it and make the best of it. Maybe find some indoor "cozy" pursuits you can enjoy during the winters - and I agree about the light - try to get as much sunlight as you can -either by opening your curtains/shades/blinds on sunny days- or, if necessary, get one of those SAD lamps. During the winters here I tend to pick up my knitting and work on that - it is my "cozy" pursuit - but yours can be anything - reading, cooking.....

Try to embrace the winter as a time for down time and reflection. I try to do that - sometimes more successfully than others. And, if all else fails, pick a workout w/ outdoor tropical scenery!

Buy the best and warmest outerwear you can so going outside doesn't have to be so painful. I second what others have said about good outerwear, I have a super heavy winter coat - probably overkill for this area - but it makes going out more bearable. And, if you really do hate to run errands, etc. in the cold maybe you can order some stuff on line so you don't have to go out as often.

Good luck!

Donna

p.s. Betsy- your area sounds really nice - I bet after living here having good snow removal services is nice - I find they do a terrible job in this area of clearing the roads after a storm, which is one of the things around here that makes me dislike the winter even more.

kalliope999 · 07-12-16, 11:29 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lauracat

Keeping my hands warm and cold air off my neck/head is critical, and is what allows me to still enjoy being outside and the bracing crispness of the winter.

Yes, I forgot to mention the neck and scarves! I agree, keeping my neck covered is a must! My coat has a high collar that zips all the way up to my chin, and I often add a scarf also (over or under).

So many pretty or more fashionable coats, like wool peacoats or princess a-line coats, have lower collar lines that let in way to much air, even with a scarf! Not nearly as warm!

Lauracat · 07-12-16, 11:41 AM

Exactly - once that cold air sneaks in through a neck opening, it somehow circulates all the way around inside the coat!

BunnyHop · 07-12-16, 12:03 PM

I live in the sweaty south, and I do understand that feeling of being held hostage by the seasons. Without air conditioning, life would be unbearable here, but at least most of the year there's no risk of freezing to death.

Even in menopause I find that if my feet and ankles get cold, the rest of me does too. It's useful when I'm hot, just wear something on my feet that lets them cool off.

In winter however, I find it crucial to keep them well covered, otherwise I'm just never warm.

Best of luck finding some new ways to cope. Do you need to update your hobbies? In terms of general contentment with life, I find sometimes I just need to find something new to do.

Nuggie's Auntie · 07-12-16, 12:10 PM

I live in Boston. I'm a native New Englander, and I love the seasons! We used to live in Washington DC/Northern Virginia, and to me, it was like living in one of Dante's circles of hell. Summers were utterly oppressive. And, like Donna mentioned, the city was absolutely pitiful about clearing snow when there was any. The whole area is crippled by an inch or two. Seriously. It never ceases to blow my mind that the capitol region of the United States of America is so inept at dealing with the smallest amount of snow! And it's not like they never get any. There is always some snow, even if it's just a little bit. Boston is amazing about plowing. Even big storms--it's business as usual the next day. Makes a huge difference!

I totally agree about scarves... and long underwear. My DH wears long underwear all winter long. It's such a good strategy! I don't struggle with SAD, but light boxes can be a huge help with that. And cod liver oil.

That said, I took up cross country skiing a couple of winters ago. I love it! I live in a pretty densely populated area, but there are still little trails nearby on which I can ski. There is also a golf course that makes snow in winter for x-country, so even if there isn't enough snow, I can still go (but there's a fee.) I've never taken to downhill. It's so expensive, and you really have to make a day of it, while I can go cross-country for 30-60 minutes nearby while the kids are at school. It's such amazing exercise, and it's so easy to learn. Maybe there is something like that you can take up to make winters a little more fun? Snowshoeing is fun, too.

Of course, all that depends on where you are in New York. But maybe taking up some winter activity, even just an indoor one, might give you something special to look forward to in winter.

I feel for you, though. It's tough when you don't like the climate where you live. If I had to live in Florida or Mississippi... oh dear, I would be so hot and b*tchy all the time... I don't know what I'd do! But Betsy's right, it's where you are and you have to make the best of it!

Pat58 · 07-12-16, 12:22 PM

Betsy summed up all the ways I've come to cope with it so beautifully. As Betsy pointed out - it's one season out of four. Early spring and late fall can still be cold but not that bad. Those are great seasons to get outdoors. If you are dressed properly, in layers, once you get moving you will warm up in short order. Then it switches from cold to invigorating!

My one rule is that I will not walk or hike outdoors if it is below 28 or if the wind chills are ridiculous. If it is above 30 I will literally force myself to go out and get some fresh air and sun.

Also as Betsy pointed out, if you can work on your mindset you may come to appreciate the special beauty that is winter's alone. I follow a retired gentleman on Facebook who goes around the area taking nature photographs. The man lives for a blizzard or nor'easter. He drives to beaches and at dawn's first light he takes photos of the beaches and environs in the pure, unmarred snow. His photos have been a therapy for me! I have also hiked at nature preserves after storms and seen amazing things. You just need to tell people you're going and have your cell, and not go in too far.

If you can't gather up the gumption to go outdoors, at least dress in layers and keep active indoors. Best wishes to you.

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07-12-16, 09:43 AM
rheash92 Join Date: Feb 2012	For those who live in cold climates I have a question for those who live in extreme cold weather. We live in New York and I really hate the cold. My husband has to stay in this are since in his field there only jobs here. I keep getting depressed as the years pass by and my hope to move to someplace warm keeps dwindling. How do you handle the cold? Do you spend a lot of time outdoors? I was thinking that I really am ok to spend my time indoors Im not that of an outdoors person anyways I do like tgo hiking but still its so hard just doing groceries or running errands in winter. Its so cold all the time. And so many of our friends are moving South. Just don't know what to do. I can't fathom the thought of living here all my life. Just getting depressed. Thanks!

07-12-16, 10:34 AM
eam531 VF Supporter Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Buffalo, NY	We live in Buffalo NY. We retired here last year from Washington DC. My husband grew up in Buffalo. We visited many cities, including Buffalo, before we made our relocation decision, and have not regretted it for a moment. In a northern climate, you really just have to embrace the idea that winters are going to be long and cold, but they are only one season out of four. Since you cannot change where you live, you'll need to change your mindset or you will be miserable. Make sure you get enough light. Endless gray days can be really depressing. I spent a winter in Germany and it was pretty gray most of the time; sunny days felt like a real blessing. If you have not considered a light box for seasonal affective disorder, you might want to consider it. Also make sure you are getting enough calcium and vitamin D. I would go stir crazy if I stayed indoors all the time in the winter. We belong to a gym and getting out of the house to exercise keeps us from getting cabin fever, as well as doing wonders for our physical and emotional health. On days when it was really too snowy to get to the gym, I worked out at home with videos. The area of Buffalo we live in (Kenmore/Town of Tonawanda) has excellent public works, so the streets get plowed right away. While we have a plow service for the driveway, we shovel our own walkways, which is very good exercise. The grocery store, bank, library, post office, and pharmacy, plus some restaurants and other shops, are all within a mile radius of our house, so we walk to those places in winter when it is not actively snowing (the rest of the year, we ride bikes). We go on walks around the neighborhood just for additional exercise. We do drive to the gym because of the gear we take with us (workout clothes and shower supplies). I have Reynaud's syndrome, so I cannot spend hours in the cold skiing and so on, but I have very good boots and gloves and outerwear and have been able to cope with the cold even with my syndrome. There can be a stark beauty in wintry weather that I appreciate. One of the best memories I have of this past winter was going to a nature preserve during a snowfall. We were the only people there and it was an unspoiled landscape. We saw several deer close-up and the ice and snow on the bare tree branches were beautiful. It was a great outing, and then we had hot chocolate afterwards, which was great too. Try to make the best of where you live, since you can't change it at this point. Please don't make yourself unhappy. __________________ Betsy There is no way of telling people they are all walking around shining like the sun--Thomas Merton People have done all kinds of remarkable things because they thought they could. People routinely fail to do quite ordinary things because they assume they can't--Reinhard Engels Stay gold, Ponyboy--S.E. Hinton Pick up your crazy heart and give it one more try--Ryan Bingham Disclosure: I have a personal relationship with a fitness instructor who has appeared in some videos.

07-12-16, 11:03 AM
kalliope999 Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Boston, MA	Betsy had really great advice! Making peace with the fact of the weather, finding beauty in the snowy landscape, getting enough light and exercise to help your mood, and appreciating how the winter makes the other three seasons that much sweeter, can all help a lot. I'd only add to make sure you have proper gear for being outdoors in the winter. I live in the Boston area now, but am originally from Cleveland. The winters are very similar, but we do a LOT more walking here than in Ohio. I'm out in the elements so much more. Are you in NYC or upstate? Not sure how often you need to walk for your errands. But it took me a while to realize that what I considered a proper winter coat in OH wasn't going to cut it for our lifestyle here. We invested in very good down and/or technical coats. I prefer a longer one, since I find that having my rear and most of my thighs covered makes a big difference. Nice wool socks (knee highs when I can!), warm and comfortable boots or Danskos, good gloves or mittens, and cute hats that stay on and cover my ears (or a good hood) all help a lot. Now that I'm prepared, the coldest weather is much more tolerable. Once I get walking I can actually get too warm in my coat and have to unzip a bit! __________________ -Nicole

07-12-16, 11:15 AM
Lauracat VF Supporter Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: New York	To echo Kalliope999, are you sure you're dressing warmly enough for the outdoors? I'm in New York City, so I'm sure it's not as cold as upstate, but once it gets in the 20s I'm in long underwear, a warm hat, turtleneck, scarf (covering my face if necessary), my "super mittens" - you get the idea. Keeping my hands warm and cold air off my neck/head is critical, and is what allows me to still enjoy being outside and the bracing crispness of the winter.

07-12-16, 11:21 AM
donnamp Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Maryland, USA	I am not a big fan of winter either - and I live in MD/DC (like Betsy used to!) and this area is too cold for me in the winter, so I feel your pain! But, I agree with Betsy, since you can't change it- you just have to accept it and make the best of it. Maybe find some indoor "cozy" pursuits you can enjoy during the winters - and I agree about the light - try to get as much sunlight as you can -either by opening your curtains/shades/blinds on sunny days- or, if necessary, get one of those SAD lamps. During the winters here I tend to pick up my knitting and work on that - it is my "cozy" pursuit - but yours can be anything - reading, cooking..... Try to embrace the winter as a time for down time and reflection. I try to do that - sometimes more successfully than others. And, if all else fails, pick a workout w/ outdoor tropical scenery! Buy the best and warmest outerwear you can so going outside doesn't have to be so painful. I second what others have said about good outerwear, I have a super heavy winter coat - probably overkill for this area - but it makes going out more bearable. And, if you really do hate to run errands, etc. in the cold maybe you can order some stuff on line so you don't have to go out as often. Good luck! Donna p.s. Betsy- your area sounds really nice - I bet after living here having good snow removal services is nice - I find they do a terrible job in this area of clearing the roads after a storm, which is one of the things around here that makes me dislike the winter even more.

07-12-16, 11:41 AM
Lauracat VF Supporter Join Date: Feb 2004 Location: New York	Exactly - once that cold air sneaks in through a neck opening, it somehow circulates all the way around inside the coat!

07-12-16, 12:03 PM
BunnyHop Join Date: Nov 2008	I live in the sweaty south, and I do understand that feeling of being held hostage by the seasons. Without air conditioning, life would be unbearable here, but at least most of the year there's no risk of freezing to death. Even in menopause I find that if my feet and ankles get cold, the rest of me does too. It's useful when I'm hot, just wear something on my feet that lets them cool off. In winter however, I find it crucial to keep them well covered, otherwise I'm just never warm. Best of luck finding some new ways to cope. Do you need to update your hobbies? In terms of general contentment with life, I find sometimes I just need to find something new to do. __________________ Anna

07-12-16, 12:10 PM
Nuggie's Auntie Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: I love that dirty water...	I live in Boston. I'm a native New Englander, and I love the seasons! We used to live in Washington DC/Northern Virginia, and to me, it was like living in one of Dante's circles of hell. Summers were utterly oppressive. And, like Donna mentioned, the city was absolutely pitiful about clearing snow when there was any. The whole area is crippled by an inch or two. Seriously. It never ceases to blow my mind that the capitol region of the United States of America is so inept at dealing with the smallest amount of snow! And it's not like they never get any. There is always some snow, even if it's just a little bit. Boston is amazing about plowing. Even big storms--it's business as usual the next day. Makes a huge difference! I totally agree about scarves... and long underwear. My DH wears long underwear all winter long. It's such a good strategy! I don't struggle with SAD, but light boxes can be a huge help with that. And cod liver oil. That said, I took up cross country skiing a couple of winters ago. I love it! I live in a pretty densely populated area, but there are still little trails nearby on which I can ski. There is also a golf course that makes snow in winter for x-country, so even if there isn't enough snow, I can still go (but there's a fee.) I've never taken to downhill. It's so expensive, and you really have to make a day of it, while I can go cross-country for 30-60 minutes nearby while the kids are at school. It's such amazing exercise, and it's so easy to learn. Maybe there is something like that you can take up to make winters a little more fun? Snowshoeing is fun, too. Of course, all that depends on where you are in New York. But maybe taking up some winter activity, even just an indoor one, might give you something special to look forward to in winter. I feel for you, though. It's tough when you don't like the climate where you live. If I had to live in Florida or Mississippi... oh dear, I would be so hot and b*tchy all the time... I don't know what I'd do! But Betsy's right, it's where you are and you have to make the best of it!

07-12-16, 12:22 PM
Pat58 VF Supporter Join Date: May 2002 Location: Connecticut	Betsy summed up all the ways I've come to cope with it so beautifully. As Betsy pointed out - it's one season out of four. Early spring and late fall can still be cold but not that bad. Those are great seasons to get outdoors. If you are dressed properly, in layers, once you get moving you will warm up in short order. Then it switches from cold to invigorating! My one rule is that I will not walk or hike outdoors if it is below 28 or if the wind chills are ridiculous. If it is above 30 I will literally force myself to go out and get some fresh air and sun. Also as Betsy pointed out, if you can work on your mindset you may come to appreciate the special beauty that is winter's alone. I follow a retired gentleman on Facebook who goes around the area taking nature photographs. The man lives for a blizzard or nor'easter. He drives to beaches and at dawn's first light he takes photos of the beaches and environs in the pure, unmarred snow. His photos have been a therapy for me! I have also hiked at nature preserves after storms and seen amazing things. You just need to tell people you're going and have your cell, and not go in too far. If you can't gather up the gumption to go outdoors, at least dress in layers and keep active indoors. Best wishes to you.