Fit-Shaming?

[Taiga]

Originally Posted by dianestjohn

I sorta remember that song - I am guessing the line you’re referring to is “I’m bringing booty back; go on and tell them skinny b*****s that..” But I think that line was referring to the series of Skinny B***h cookbooks that were created and published in the mid 2000s as how-to guides to being thin and seemed to sorta make the point that everyone would want to be a skinny b****h and they could be if only they would eat better, exercise more and drink Bethany Frankel’s SkinnyGirl margaritas or whatever So to me that line is just a play on those books and not an insult to thinner women. Are there other parts of that song that are insulting to thin women? I totally agree, it is as bad to say mean things about being thinner as it is to say mean things about being fatter.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7PCkvCPvDXk

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z6xXEaWz5Iw--Tony Horton makes a guest appearance towards the end

[dianestjohn]

LOL!!! The Tony Horton bit at the end is classic, even the side effects listed on the screen 😄

[dianestjohn]

Originally Posted by CoolGirlinFl888

That song, all about that bass, makes fun of thinner women. Someone made a parody song saying the opposite, talking badly about bigger women and they were panned and booed. It's always been that way. It's like you can talk bad about thin or skinny and even in shape women but don't you DARE say anything bad about big women. It seems fat is in now and plus sized women are now the It girls. I have always thought it was wrong that you can talk about skinny women but not big girls. It has been that way since I was a young child.

Agree, it’s definitely wrong to judge anyone based on body size and if that song made thin women feel bad I am sad about that. But I disagree that bigger women are not made fun of, talked about and judged harshly. I have been a size 14-ish for most of my adult life, beginning in high school, and people have said very hurtful things to me - “Are you pregnant or just fat?”, “How could you let yourself go like that“ (when I was 17 years old), the boy in high school I liked told a friend that my a** was too big and he would never go out with me, in grade school we went around the room saying what we wanted to be when we grew up and when I said “stewardess” (this was before the “flight attendant” days) the teacher said, “Oh, I don’t think you could do that, they only want thin women” to much laughter, “you should lose weight before the wedding/job interview/reunion,” Try this diet, it’s just what you need, You have such a pretty face, Should you be eating that?, etc. etc. etc. And I am tall, attractive and well proportioned, had a robust dating life, am happily married, etc., so I know I have experienced less of this behavior than larger women. I have also been with friends where they looked at large people and made horrible comments OMG look at that tub, does she just sit around eating all day??. Once a massage therapist who was a friend said he was sick of working on Two Ton Tessies, when I looked shocked, he said, oh not you, I mean those real big fat ladies, I have so many fat clients, it’s disgusting. And these are just the comments that come to me right off the bat. Large people are judged very harshly. If thin women felt insulted by the Meghan Trainor song, it’s just a fraction of what large women go through their entire lives.

[Erica H.]

Originally Posted by dianestjohn

Agree, it’s definitely wrong to judge anyone based on body size and if that song made thin women feel bad I am sad about that. But I disagree that bigger women are not made fun of, talked about and judged harshly. I have been a size 14-ish for most of my adult life, beginning in high school, and people have said very hurtful things to me - “Are you pregnant or just fat?”, “How could you let yourself go like that“ (when I was 17 years old), the boy in high school I liked told a friend that my a** was too big and he would never go out with me, in grade school we went around the room saying what we wanted to be when we grew up and when I said “stewardess” (this was before the “flight attendant” days) the teacher said, “Oh, I don’t think you could do that, they only want thin women” to much laughter, “you should lose weight before the wedding/job interview/reunion,” Try this diet, it’s just what you need, You have such a pretty face, Should you be eating that?, etc. etc. etc. And I am tall, attractive and well proportioned, had a robust dating life, am happily married, etc., so I know I have experienced less of this behavior than larger women. I have also been with friends where they looked at large people and made horrible comments OMG look at that tub, does she just sit around eating all day??. Once a massage therapist who was a friend said he was sick of working on Two Ton Tessies, when I looked shocked, he said, oh not you, I mean those real big fat ladies, I have so many fat clients, it’s disgusting. And these are just the comments that come to me right off the bat. Large people are judged very harshly. If thin women felt insulted by the Meghan Trainor song, it’s just a fraction of what large women go through their entire lives.

I am very sorry for what you have experienced.

I have been everywhere from underweight to obese, and have experienced rude comments on both ends, but it felt much more painful, humiliating, and judgmental as a larger woman. A couple of years ago, I read about "thin privilege" and realized that's what ultimately drives me to stay thin now. I had never heard that term before, but it absolutely exists.

That being said, my husband and one of my sons have always struggled to keep weight on or gain and they have received many rude comments about being thin or the amount they eat.

I wish people would just mind their own business.

Erica

[dianestjohn]

Originally Posted by Erica H.

I am very sorry for what you have experienced.

I have been everywhere from underweight to obese, and have experienced rude comments on both ends, but it felt much more painful, humiliating, and judgmental as a larger woman. A couple of years ago, I read about "thin privilege" and realized that's what ultimately drives me to stay thin now. I had never heard that term before, but it absolutely exists.

That being said, my husband and one of my sons have always struggled to keep weight on or gain and they have received many rude comments about being thin or the amount they eat.

I wish people would just mind their own business.

Erica

I was not familiar with the term thin privilege and I looked it up and find it true and fascinating.

[Gams]

When I worked at the gas station, if an overweight person came in and bought candy or doughnuts, there was always someone in the store who would say, “The LAST thing you need is a candy bar.” What the heck makes people think it’s any of their business?

[Leonana]

I was thin as a child, and my college roommate was heavy. I mentioned that it hurt when I was called names for being thin, and also for being tall. She informed me it wasn't as bad as her teasing for being heavy. I think her dismissal of my feelings hurt more than the actual teasing.

Originally Posted by dianestjohn

I was not familiar with the term thin privilege and I looked it up and find it true and fascinating.

I had to look it up too. I do know that it is harder to find clothes at the thrift store when you are heavier. I noticed that even when I dropped one size, it was easier to find better clothes there.

[Sand]

My first thought was "She looks great!" followed by "I hope she's healthy and happy!"

I have dealt with food/eating issues all my life, and I have lost and gained significant amounts of weight due to health issues.

I think a lot of times, people make assumptions about us based on their own issues. I received both criticism and praise at different stages of weight gain and loss. It used to consume so much of my time and I have made major gains in embracing that I'm more than my weight and size.

I worry when the media makes a big deal about significant weight loss or gain. It makes me think of Karen Carpenter and Luther Vandross, both beautiful singers who struggled with these issues.

[Vintage VFer]

Speaking of awkward situations...

My SIL had to fly recently. The airplane was packed with all seats full. An obese woman was seated in the middle seat next to my SIL. The woman took up her seat and parts of the seats on either side. My SIL flew for 3 hours only partly in her seat and partly in the aisle.

I hate flying, have claustrophobia anyway and the virus has me freaked out. Airlines have continued to add seats on planes and make them too small.

I would have gotten off that airplane.

[VainJane]

Originally Posted by CoolGirlinFl888

That song, all about that bass, makes fun of thinner women. Someone made a parody song saying the opposite, talking badly about bigger women and they were panned and booed. It's always been that way. It's like you can talk bad about thin or skinny and even in shape women but don't you DARE say anything bad about big women. It seems fat is in now and plus sized women are now the It girls. I have always thought it was wrong that you can talk about skinny women but not big girls. It has been that way since I was a young child.

At least in mainstream western culture and media, larger (and even normal-size) women were subject to a lot of criticism and ridicule for a long time. Alicia Silverstone, who has never been overweight, was called "Fat Girl" in the 90s for her appearance in Batman & Robin. In one of the Sex And The City movies, Carrie mercilessly mocked Samantha for gaining a few pounds. Even in the fitness culture, which is supposed to be about health, until recently there was a lot of language glorifying slimness - videos titled "Skinny Sculpt" or "10-Pound Slimdown" (from my favorites Ellen and Jessica, no less), magazine articles on achieving a thigh gap, etc. I, for one, am very happy to see less of that now.

Today's "it girls" who are larger are mostly focused on size inclusivity and representation in the fashion industry, not on disparaging slim women.