Struggling with fit vs attractive/young

[Gams]

My aunts have always been rather gleeful about my mom and sister and me growing older. I was showing one of them some vacation pictures and she started laughing and said , “Oh my God - your mom looks so old!!!” I said, “Well, she’s 86 - exactly what should she look like?” And for the record, Mom still goes to the health club every day. Isn’t someone allowed a few wrinkles at 86?

[primrosecat]

I love being 'invisible'. I embrace it. It took a long time getting to this point, and it wasn't easy. It has it's rewards. But I know that not everyone feels this way, and that it's a very individual thing.

[tiffanywu]

Great Edie Brickell song and video! Love the doggie and the energy

[Demeris]

Originally Posted by primrosecat

I love being 'invisible'. I embrace it. It took a long time getting to this point, and it wasn't easy. It has it's rewards. But I know that not everyone feels this way, and that it's a very individual thing.

It took me a year or so to embrace and rejoice in the invisibility. I just used my invisibility gift to travel to Italy alone. It was my first solo foreign travel venture, and I had a blast! I doubt I would have been able to do it so easily if I were 20 or 30 years younger.

[primrosecat]

Demeris, good for you.

[frogribbit]

Originally Posted by Gams

My aunts have always been rather gleeful about my mom and sister and me growing older. I was showing one of them some vacation pictures and she started laughing and said , “Oh my God - your mom looks so old!!!” I said, “Well, she’s 86 - exactly what should she look like?” And for the record, Mom still goes to the health club every day. Isn’t someone allowed a few wrinkles at 86?

Wow! That is awful. They should be celebrating that she is EIGHTY-SIX! and still healthy enough to take care of herself and go to the gym.

I'm 55 and I've got the wrinkles going on Trying to embrace that and not put my glasses on to look in the mirror...haha!!

[Jeanne Marie]

You are all such inspirations! I loved reading everyone's thoughts.

As some of you probably remember, I went through a huge life change about 4 years ago, losing my husband of almost 40 years in Feb of 2015. As you can imagine, it was a devastating, life altering event. I never expected to be widowed at such a young age. I was 58. I chose to channel my grief into fitness after he died, and I literally spent all my days at my best friend's gym, working out, helping instruct, helping run the place. It was the best medicine ever, and it also got me in the best shape of my life. It also reinforced the notion that as we age, we are SO much more than our looks. To be able to work out, run, do things that are physical and tough is such a blessing. As someone else said, aging is tough, but the alternative is not so good. I know that better than most!

Many of the women at my gym (it's a HIIT circuit training program) are considerably younger than I am. Many of them have lots of botox, face lifts, breast implants, etc. While there is nothing wrong with doing what makes you feel good, I hope that I am able to show them that as you age, you really don't need those things. I am 62, so of course I have wrinkles. I also have small breasts. I refuse to see those things as a negative. I am healthy, happy, active and fit, and that is what is going to carry me gracefully into my elder years.

Last summer (almost 3 years after DH passed) I met a man. A wonderful man! He is the light of my life. Our relationship brings me happiness, contentment and joy. He is 60, and we talk about how perfect it is that we met each other at this stage of life. Our kids are grown, we are settled where we want to be, we aren't interested in anything but being together and living a healthy active lifestyle. We love each other's appearances .... those wrinkles and not so smooth body parts are like badges of honor for the life we've led thus far. He is definitely a key part in keeping me positive and joyful about aging.

[cataddict]

Jeanne Marie, I remember that you lost our husband and your father in a relatively short time. I also lost my father, but I am blessed to still have my precious husband. I can't imagine the pain and loss you experienced. Your story is as inspirational as well, living proof that it is possible to find a new and wonderful life after devastating sorrow. I'm so happy for you.

[Leonana]

Jessica Smith posted this article on her FB page today.

What Do Women With Positive Body Images Have That Others Don't?

https://health.usnews.com/health-new...at-others-dont

It reflects a lot of what we’ve said here.

[Leonana]

Originally Posted by primrosecat

I love being 'invisible'. I embrace it. It took a long time getting to this point, and it wasn't easy. It has it's rewards. But I know that not everyone feels this way, and that it's a very individual thing.

One of my favorite mystery series is the Dorothy Martin books by Jeanne Dams. She uses her “invisibility” to solve mysteries!